[video]
I used to have the tumblr app on my BlackBerry Torch. And then it crapped out, saying that there was an error getting to the dashboard, and that my login information was wrong.
Except I haven’t changed my login information. It was all correct. I would login to tumblr on my browser and have no issue. So I’m not sure what’s wrong. I’ve emailed tumblr about it, but they’ve never gotten back to me.
So damn annoying.
… is what this post will be about, I suppose. Cause it’s not something I normally do but should be in the habit of doing.
I’m telling myself that it’ll get me in the habit of writing, which would be a bonus.
Still jobless. Not for lack of looking, but it seems that KW is as hard up for jobs as Windsor is. Makes that really damn annoying. What I wouldn’t give to have some sort of regular schedule in my life, rather than sitting on the couch and watching Netflix all of the time like a fat, lazy fuck.
I am planning on going back to school in the fall, finally. FINALLY. I’ve only been out of school since 2007. I think 6 years is a long enough time to go back. It’ll be a very nice change of pace.
I miss having lots of local friends to hang out with. I’ve only got one friend here that I feel comfortable hanging out with on my own. There are some that my man and I share that I could hang out with, but it always feels off to me if he’s not there. Like they’re his friends, and I’m just hanging out with them. It doesn’t make too much sense, I suppose, but that how it feels to me.
Nothing else to report, I suppose.
[video]
It’s been a very fucked up weekend.
Found a dear friend after he had been dead for four or five days. I didn’t see him lying in his bed personally, but I will never forget the smell.
In my head, it wasn’t him but some hobo that was magically in his bed.
It’s so odd to know he’s gone when he had been laughing and drinking on my couch on Sunday, the night before he died. The last time I saw him he was asleep on my couch.
He could have just as easily died here as at his own place. Even if he had been here, I know that there’s nothing that could have been done to save him. He lived his own life, knew his own problems, and dealt with them the way he wanted to. But if I had known that his doctor had told him that if he kept pushing something awful would happen, I would’ve been on his ass. But he knew that would happen, and I didn’t learn until it was too late.
His years of drinking and drugs is what killed him. It was his choice not to listen to his doctor as well as he should have, but I think if he had realized this is what would have happened he would have asked for help. Maybe even asked me for help, because he knows first hand how hard I’ve been trying to help my man with his own alcohol demons.
Sadly, as much as it’s a shock, it isn’t. I wish I hadn’t come to the point that when he was on a multiple day bender that I would just shrug and go “oh, that’s totally something he would do”. If I had known he had gone back to using coke on what was apparently semi-regularly, I would have tried to talk to him. I would have tried to be that person who says nothing and just listens, who wouldn’t have judged him for what he was saying or feeling. But he played that same role to too many people to ever let himself take advantage of when it was offered to him.
I wish it hadn’t become normal not to hear from him weeks at a time.
I wish a lot of things.
But most of all, above anything else, I hope his family will be all right, in their own time. If I could give them anything, I would give him back to them. After slapping him for being so selfish and stupid for putting everyone through this.
I can only hope that his close friends with similar problems take this as a lesson and a warning to go on the right, healthy path. Whether that ends up being religious or just personal, we all need to learn from this.
I’m going to miss you, Brian.
Omnomnom.
OHAI MODDED STUBBLE?
“what is love?”
… they way they say your name is different.
Baby don’t hurt me. Don’t hurt me, no more.
(Source: upsidenicole, via justsamma)
…aaaaaand Dragon Age 3 (and Cullen) is pretty much a go, ladies and gentlemen.
I have no much excite I don’t know what to do!
